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first grade in school
As I sat in the class, stared at the girl next to me. I called her my "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and realized that she's so beautiful. But she didn't notice me, and I knew it.
After class, she walked up to me and asked me for some piddly thing just to get laugh together.
When she wanted to go, she said "bye" to me included with her beautiful smile.
At that time, I wanted to tell her, I just wanted her to know. I wanna say that I feel more than just a friends to her, I don't know what kind of feeling, but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
second grade
A message received, and it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love to another boy had broken her heart. I was broken too. She asked me to listen to her because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she knows what i feel.
After 2 hours, a long conversation, much tears, and three bags of snacks, she decided to go home. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me that melting smile. I wish i could give her a hug.
At that time, I wanted to tell her, I just wanted her to know. I wanna say that I feel more than just a friends to her, I don't know what kind of feeling, but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
Senior year
The day before prom she walked to me. "My date is sick" she said, "he's not going to go well". and we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step.
I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I know i love her, I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!"
I really wanted to tell her, I just wanted her to know. I wanna say that I feel more than just a friends to her, I love her, but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma.
I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks".
I really want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.
A Few Years Later
Now I stand in the garden of party. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man.
I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it.
But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!" "thank you so much"
I want to tell her, I want her to know what i have been feeling to her, all that long. I love her but I was just too shy, and I think that I have to flow my feeling away.
Years Later
Years passed, now I look down at the grave of a girl who used to be my "best friend". Her family is here, and her mom come to me and give me a diary, her diary.
I read the diary. In a part where she had wrote her diploma years. This is what i read:
"I stare at him, and realize he's so adorable. But he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. After class, i walk in to him to get some fun and laugh together. I want to tell him, I just want him to know that I feel more than just a friends to him. I don't know what kind of feeling, but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! Or maybe someday"
`I wish I did too...` I thought to my self, and I cry.